rambling. oh, and more rambling.

Phew! It was difficult, but I did it!

2 posts in June.

Pathetic.

So....there are many things swirling around in my head. Things I want, things I need, things I want to do, things I need to do. I'm a bit obsessed with thinking about these things, yet, I have very little motivation for the things that need to get done and not near enough money for the things that need to be purchased.

...new dishwasher (current one no longer *cleans*), front porch furniture, upstairs bathroom remodel, living room furniture, new mattress, mastopexy...garage door painted, picnic table painted, broken Adirondack chair fixed and both painted, back screen door painted, front porch painted, toys and outgrown clothes donated...

I have drawn 3 tattoos that I want to get, and am searching for a big colorful butterfly, or a group of them, too. I have to earn these new tattoos, by losing weight, and have joined Weight Watchers again (on June 9) and have lost 6.4 lbs in 3 weeks. I feel ok about that. It didn't come on overnight, it certainly isn't going to come off that way. At 20 lbs lost I can get my next tattoo. I am motivated by this. I am also motivated by having WW buddies this time around. I had buddies when I was successful and made Lifetime 5+ years ago. I have joined 2 times since the boy was born, and have failed miserably. I'm ready. I'm excited. I don't want to be uncomfortable in my skin anymore. My husband is so fit. SO incredibly fit. And even more so now that he does hard physical labor all day. We must look really silly together. Ugh.

I want to wear all of my skinny clothes. I spent a LOT of money on those clothes.

I want to go on a family vacation. Very much need to get away, but think travel with a rambunctious 3 year old boy will be more frustrating than relaxing. Plus, it would have to be fun for all of us, which is difficult when your child loves water, hot weather, being outside, etc. and mom hates all of those things. Ugh. Need to look for a place nearby that has something for everyone. I hate being hot...so it will probably have to wait until the fall. And then we'll have Zoo Preschool schedule to deal with. Ugh.

Need to decide what classes to take and get registered. Hello. Why am I procrastinating this?

Moving to our new office on the 17th. Exciting and scary at the same time.

There's more. I'm just very well prepared.

THUH-RHEE

Ok, yes, I love my son to pieces.  But...

The early stages of three are making me insane.  Where to begin?

The mornings...he will stand and cry until I pick him up and CARRY him down the steps.  He weighs 35 lbs and I have a friggin herniated disc in my neck!  Pain.

He eats breakfast in front of cartoons...which is fine, it's peaceful...but then REFUSES to brush his teeth.  I have to bring the tooth brush to him and practically SIT ON HIM to brush his friggin teeth.  Every.Single.Morning.  Exhausting.

Lately, he wants me to CARRY him to the car too.  UGH.

We were at a party a couple weeks ago, and all of the kids (ALL) were lining up and getting ready to take their turn at hitting the pinata.  My son stood in the middle of the kids and screamed at me, in the nastiest 3 year old tone ever, "Nooooo Mommy.  I don't want to stand in line...I just want to use the bat.  NOW!!!!"  Nice.

The time out chair does not seem to work anymore, so time outs are now taken standing with his face in the corner.  He hates it.  Maybe it will work.

He sobs when he doesn't get his way.  Sobs.  Huge tears streaming down his face.  Throws himself on the floor.  Gags and coughs like he is going to barf.

He also sobs when his feelings get hurt.  I feel sort of bad.  But not really.

The night time putting on pajama issues have settled a bit...because I decided I should start doing bedtime alone again.  Since daddy lost his job, we have been doing bedtime together...I think the boy felt the need to entertain us and see what kind of reaction he could get.  He was out of control and often times daddy would have to PIN HIM DOWN to get his jammies on.  Since I have been doing it alone, there is less craziness.  So, we're going to go with this.

He gets over stimulated/excited/whatever and acts like a complete jerk.  He gets upset when friends play with his toys, and sometimes even acts out by dumping a pail of sand on a friends head, or hitting a friend with whatever toy he is playing with.  It's ridiculous.

He wants to be the center of attention.  He cannot stand it when the world does not revolve around his every breath.

There is so much I don't like about three that I really can't put it all into words.

I love him to pieces and absolutely cannot imagine life without him.  I am hopeful that three will only last until four and not until five like some other parents have told me.  UGH.