yes, YOU, in the red jeep

Ok, lady. You need to settle down. I can't help the fact that I am a more creative and experienced driver than you. I was, after all, trained to drive in Michigan. You are obviously an Ohio driver. I can understand your frustration...but that does not mean that you should ram up to my side and pinch me out, nor does it mean that you should slam on your breaks while I am flipping you off. It's not my fault that the Dog Warden was trying to get some stupid mangy mutt off the expressway and causing traffic to back up. Yes, I did ride in the exit lane until the last minute and then tried to merge into crawling traffic. But, I had my turn signal on. It should have been obvious that I was going to get over. No need to get bitchy. And, by the way, yes, I did indeed say "FU*K YOU" when I was flipping you off.

But then when the Dog Warden stopped backing up traffic, you sped off very quickly. I didn't see where you went. I don't know if you were running from me (you should), or if you were just in a hurry (like the rest of us) to get to your destination. If I would have seen where you went...I probably would have paid you a little visit.

On to more interesting things. Who knew that which CUP you use was so important? The Boy is very stubborn and is very frustrated that he isn't BIG. He wanted milk. I learned a few months ago that he has to help get the milk out and put it away, we don't ever have a problem there. And sometimes he likes to pick out his own cup, sometimes he doesn't care. Sometimes he doesn't mind a sippy, sometimes he insists upon having a real cup/glass. Well, tonight, NOTHING made him happy. He literally threw himself on the floor and cried ("No, I don't want it anymore!" and "Put it right back!") for 20 minutes! Seriously. He cried real tears. He was so upset he was coughing and choking. Finally, after 20 minutes, he said "Mommy, see me", so I went over to see him. He wanted me to hold him. We sat and watched Scooby Doo and then he said he wanted some milk (Damn you, milk [organic], why must you be so good?) Oh great...not this again. Not looking forward to what was around the corner, we went into the kitchen. He said he wanted the orange cup (a sippy). I got the cup, he got the milk. I poured the milk. He wanted to help put the lid on. He twisted it on (the wrong way - so it actually wasn't on at all), so I asked if I could help. He said "yeah". So, I twisted it on. "NOOOOO! I wanna do it!" Ok, so I untwisted it. He twisted it on...a little better this time...and I had to finish. Nope. He wasn't happy with that either. Then he spotted Daddy's Medieval Times cup on the counter. "Um, that one". I said, you want your milk in Daddy's cup? "Yeah! Uh huh!" Ok, so I asked if it was ok if I pour it from the orange cup to Daddy's cup. Again, "Yeah! Uh huh!". So, I did. And he was THRILLED. Drank up all of his milk. Didn't spill a drop. And then said "Thanks Mommy".

I guess it was worth it. :) Politeness gets you far.

And now...my cup...yeah, it has PBR in it. "Yeah! Uh huh! Pabst Blue Ribbon".

In closing: American Idol fans...why do you like David Archuletta? He bores me to tears and I do not think he has a good voice. Why do the judges like him? Is it because he is young? For me...it's Jason and David (Cook). All the way.

the 3 s's

Why yes, that is stubble on my leg. And a spider vein too. But here are the fs/ny silver ballet flats.

j'adore

Temper Tantrums and Time Outs

Well...he didn't throw the biggest temper tantrum at the cookout! The biggest tt was reserved for another boy at the party. He was 3 years old! There were a lot of kids, and a lot of boys! It was nice to hang out with so many other families and see how their children interact with other children and how other parents handle temper tantrums. Pretty much how we do...ignore it. It will stop. And if it doesn't stop after a few minutes, remove the kid.

There was another little boy who was just about 10 days older than my Boy, and all this kid did was "grunt". No words. Just grunting. But, he had 2 older siblings, so maybe that's why. But, it always makes me smile when I see children the same age as my Boy who don't have his vocabulary. He IS brilliant, after all. :)

He did hit a little girl, and Baby Daddy asked him to stop and apologize. But the Boy wouldn't and then he hit Baby Daddy. He got a time out. At a party! He has to stop hitting. And he has to start listening. Period.

As for the Coach bag I was thinking about all weekend, I ended up not getting it. My $50 off gift certificate expired today too. And it's not good online. So, I guess I'm stuck with the one I have. And the other 57 handbags in my closet.

I'm wearing the silver ballet flats tomorrow...if it doesn't rain, that is.

Long after due days off...

It's days like these...that make me wish I had more days like these. I took a long overdue day off work. I took the Boy to the sitter. My first stop was Starbucks. I had a double nf venti mocha latte. It was divine. Then off to the Anderson's for some fruit (for a fruit salad for a cookout on Sunday) and plants for the flower beds! Next stop...home to plant! I spent 3 hours cleaning up and planting! It was wonderful. Then a quick clean up and off to the mall for some pre-NYC-wedding-guest-dress shopping. I actually found 3 dresses that may work. I do want to try and lose some weight (as usual) and also want to wait until the invite arrives so I can get a feel for the type of dress I should choose. I also picked up a baby gift for a friend who just had her THIRD BOY...3 under 5! ACK! I milled around the Coach store to find something to spend my gift card on. There are 2 possibilities...but I'm not sure if I can justify it or not. I suppose I could sell the one I bought (and don't really love) in September, on Ebay. Hmm. Then I picked up Chinese for dinner (I forgot to eat all day and was famished), picked up the boy and spent an hour with the hubby before he went to work.

I'm planning my next day off. The next one won't take 2 years to plan.

if the shoe fits - continued

The silver fs/ny ballet flats arrived this morning. They are the perfect size and are buttery soft as expected. I am in LOVE! I just wish I hadn't worn gold jewelry today or I would put them on.

The black ones are stretching out nicely, and no longer feel snug on my big toes.

All is good in the land of ballet flats! Horray!

if the shoe fits

Those of you who know me, know that I am a shoe addict. I admit it. I have a real problem. I thought that when my favorite shoe store downtown closed that I would be able to live day to day without purchasing shoes. Wrong.

Well, let me back up. When the store first closed, I think I was depressed, and I didn't buy any shoes. For a little while. And when the weather changed, I was looking for my favorite pair of ballet flats and when I found them I remembered that I need to replace them because they are trashed (from too much love).

I thought I would try to save some money and found a cute pair at Target. $14.99! Well, now I remember why I don't buy $14.99 shoes. Because they SUCK! They tore up my feet. I had a blister on each heel, and on the top of my foot near my pinky toe. Nice! And my feet and legs were so tired and achy after a day of wear.

So, to hell with those. I hopped on zappos...and found my favorite brand of flats (french sole [fs/ny] if you haven't tried them, and you love flats, you don't know what you are missing). They didn't have the black suede in my size or the black butter leather. Ack. So, on to endless.com. They have the black butter leather, in stock! I order the same size as my trashed pair.

They arrive in a day. Free shipping. They're a little snug! I think my feet have grown. I don't remember my trashed pair ever feeling snug? I wore them despite snugness. Now I can't exchange them. They are very comfortable, and despite being a little snug, they aren't tearing up my feet. My big toes just feel a bit squished. They'll stretch. They're butter leather.

Since I can't exchange them, I order ANOTHER pair (in silver, of course) in the next size. They should be here tomorrow!

Back to growing feet...I wore another one of my faves the other day and they were snug. They never used to be snug. I really do think my feet have grown. Along with my ass.

once you go black

It happens to me every time. I wish there was something I could do to make it stop.

We're going to NYC in July (yes, I do realize it's 3 months away). I have started mini-panicking about what to wear. We're attending a wedding. Yes. A wedding in NYC! I have visited NYC every year for the past 18 years. It's one of my most favorite places on earth. But, I've never attended a wedding IN NYC. I'm a little freaked out. I do consider myself a New Yorker at heart though. Always have. Always will.

First of all: the baby weight is not gone, so I feel all gross and fat and flabby and convinced that I am going to look terrible in whatever I decide to wear. I guess I do have 3 months and I could - technically - lose this "baby weight" by then. I'm going to try. I swear. But, I suppose that would begin by not eating mac-n-cheese for dinner last night.

Second: they (who the hell are "they" anyway) say you shouldn't wear black to weddings. HUH? It supposedly signifies that you disapprove of the union. Well, no, silly, that's not the case at all. Some of us just can't imagine putting any other color on our bodies. No matter how pale and pasty we are. Black is it. And I KNOW New Yorkers would agree with me.

So, do I bother looking for a non-black dress? Or do I just stick with what I know and love? Would I even feel comfortable in a "color"? Or would I feel like a circus clown? I'm thinking the latter. I know me. I know how I feel about color. You know that once you go black you never go back.

Ok, so, do I try and find something with a print? Or do I just stick with straight up black? I know sleeveless and strapless are out of the question unless I miraculously lose this weight and end up looking like Jillian Michaels.


Hmph. My life is so complex.

all chairs should have arms

I was nervous! Hell. I was downright scared!

The Boy has been protesting high chairs and boosters for about 6-8 wks. At home, he will sit in the high chair for breakfast only, and only once in a while. He refuses to sit at the dining room table on anything other than a regular chair. He wants to be big so bad! When I try to put him in the high chair or booster, this is what I get: "No! I don't like it chair!"

So, we went to dinner last night my my 'rents. We had only taken the Boy out to dinner once since this protest began, and it was hell! So, I was not looking forward to it. I was prepared to be very grumpy and leave early.

He actually did really well! The chairs had "arms" which could neatly be tucked under the table. The Boy thought that was cool! And so did we! Our waitress was fantastic and made sure to take care of the Boy first. (When I served years ago, we learned to take care of small children first - I'm not sure when this stopped being practiced, but it's terrible when you have a server who has no clue) She brought him a cup of fruit (which was included with his kids meal!) within a few minutes of taking our order. She filled his sippy cup with water out of the beverage hose, which he thought was very cool and asked her for more on 3 different occassions. (she obliged) She brought his grilled cheese sandwich and fries before our meals. She said "hi" to him, in return, each time she walked by.

We were all about 70% finished with our meals when he started getting squirmy. He did manage to squirm himself out of the chair and under the table once. But then he was relatively content so sit on Daddy's lap and eat broccoli off his plate.

All in all, it was a fairly relaxing meal. That's a welcome change.

Happy birthday baby daddy

I'm a little bit drunk. I probably shouldn't do this under the influence, but what the hay.

Today is my baby daddy's birthday. 39! The 'rents came over to watch the boy and we went to dinner. The last few times we have had the opportunity to go on a "date", we have ended up at home at 9pm-ish. Pathetic? Yes. But seriously, it's been a long time. It's like we don't know how to have a life AB (after Boy). If dinner ran late and we couldn't make it to a movie on time, we would just come home. Huh? Yes, you read that right. We would waste our opportunity to do something, anything, without our child. Sad.

So, we were going to go to a movie tonight - but lets face it - there's nothing out right now worthy of paying full price....so, we kicked around the idea of bowling. Then it dawned on me....POOL! Baby daddy and I used to play pool all the time! I love pool and played for many years in many bars! I actually used to be quite good.

Hello Miss Cue. We played pool for 2 and a half hours after dinner! We got home at 10:30! P.M.! We drank draft beer (OMG!) and played 10 games of pool! I think I even won nearly (but not quite) half of them! It was exciting.

But now...here I sit. 11:15pm. Baby daddy's in bed because draft beer makes him sick. He has a headache (aren't I supposed to be the one with the headache?) and feels pukey. Delish. Oh well. Happy birthday baby daddy. I love you.

weave in, weave out

My son likes to carry a bucket (and wooden spoon) along on our walks around the 'hood. The bucket - for treasures. The wooden spoon - for scooping (mud puddles mostly), of course.

Yesterday's booty proved to be quite a find. My little man's bucket was filled with various twigs, rocks, leaves, bark, pieces of roof single, and...a braid! Yes! A hair extension! A weave!

Anyone out there missing a braid?

I did mention that I would frequently gush about how brilliant my son is. He will be 2 years old a month from tomorrow. A 2 year old should have approximately 50-75 words in his/her vocabulary and be able to string together simple 2-3 word sentences. My son...brilliant as he is...said to me (in protest, of course) the other day after changing his diaper, "No, Mommy. I don't wanna wear pants anymore!" 2-3 words. pfft.

Proud mama that I am...I let him roam around sans pants, per his request.

He made me do it...

Ok, so here goes. I just couldn't let that no-good-x-gay-husband of mine have a blog and not have one of my own. I really don't have much to say, at least not tonight.

I guess this blog is going to be ramblings of a boring mom and wife who works full time in the environmental industry. I spend a lot of time alone - well, not really alone, but with my son - pondering what to do next. Sometimes I have ideas, sometimes we just sit and watch scooby doo.

I will frequently gush about how wonderfully brilliant my son is, but I will likely also complain about how he drives me nuts sometimes.

Hang in there, I promise it will be a fun ride. And if you don't think it is, you can just get off.